If we have to accept that there are companies that are totally badass like, say our recent post about Google, then too, we must accept that there are companies that are equally punkass. AOL, aka America Online, (NYSE: AOL) is a punkass company that comes to mind. A little known fact about AOL is that is was originally Quantum Computer Services, some kind of computer company franchise. Today headquartered in New York, its original headquarters were in Dulles, VA (full disclosure, I worked around and in tech in that neighborhood for quite a few years).

In the 90’s AOL grew into, for all intents and purposes, the premier internet portal with a subscription membership that was well over 30 million worldwide. AOL grew on some clever positioning as the everyday user’s guide to the internet. It made everything on the web easy, even though their performance was horrendous. (A few AOL guys from that time whispered to me that their (unpublicized) differentiater at the time was the ability to open (Usenet?) zipped porn files automatically. I don’t know the truth about that, I am just saying…. In any event, AOL was hot back then. Market value in those heady days rose to $240 billion!

Then AOL just got plain stupid. As the web grew, with free, distributed content, fast search, with search engines beginning to deliver what users could reasonably judge to be the most relevant content for their consumption, there were no matching offers or structural changes at AOL. Performance remained iffy, the acquisition of Netscape was a disaster – and actually a major setback for search. AOL was unable to see beyond subscriber revenue even as the future held the threat of precipitous decline. All this notwithstanding, AOL merged with Time Warner in 2001. Brick and Motar media company marries internet. I am sure Steve Case thought he saw synergies. I am sure I, and most people with half a brain never did. The people with half a brain and I were right as it turned out.

Here is some surely stupid shit that speaks to AOL’s punkassitude: In 2006, they raised their subscription price. I think I know why. They were counting on subscribers who had forgotten, were too busy or too dead to cancel, not noticing the change in the billing amount. But reality, as we all know is a bitch. Before the end of the year, AOL was giving away pretty much all their shit for free. AOL had screwed up not only their valuation at this, but also that of Time Warner. Steve Case and the original band were long gone. AOL had no talent, no standing in tech anymore. (Another side note – I worked with a lot of former AOLers. I sort of understand why the thing failed. With one exception, I don’t remember any world beaters).

For a company that literally led in internet access in the late nineties to early 2000’s, AOL has no claim to any lasting innovation (if there is, someone send me a note – I would love to know). They failed to leverage their subscription and reach for any meaningful business, technology or even societal purpose. Ok, so maybe in Dulles they can claim 2 exits on route 28 and the growth of the Ashburn suburb as directly attributable to AOL but that is it and even that is a stretch. The more lasting impression is one of failure and lack of innovation, the close call of nearly bringing down, by association Time Warner, and the sad pathetic shell of a once proud tech giant. Punkass. Painful punkassitude. Period!!

I spend a lot of time thinking about badassitude – the way true badasses carry, exhibit and display their badassedness.  Sometimes it is a trick finding true and pure badassitude because you have to make judgments at 2 levels – a) that the dude or dudette is a badass and b) that the dude or dudette has any badassitude. The two judgments are remotely related but mostly not. A badass can have so little badassitude that it would be within reason to describe him or her as a punkass!

A punkass is anyone with zero or no badassitude except that the punkass tends mostly to be a pretender. Not only does a punkass not have any badassitude, a punkass for the most part pretends to have badassitude. And a punkass tends to lie (this is the first indicator of a punkass – lying). A punkass tends to pretend that all the badassitude that is contrary to their punkassedness does not exist.

Imagine, for lack of a better description, a politician whose public positions have become untenable. The one thing long term politicians have learned to do rather well, is to ignore the existence of new or contrary information and persist, however ridiculous it sounds, on espousing a ridiculously untenable (fictional) position in spite of the evidence. Side note – Susan Collins, the Republican senator from Maine twisting in the wind, trying to explain her completely fictional pronouncements about events surrounding Abdul Mutallab’s arrest et al was exemplary in the display of punkassitude.

On this blog and to be fair, if we are going to talk about badassitude, we have to similarly examine the depravity, sadness, failure, no account sorryness, lying, dishonesty etc., that describes the opposite and that opposite is punkassitude. So we should assume, as we go forward that if we rule that one has exhibited complete badassitude fail, then by the same token, or by implication, they must have achieved close to total punkassitude.

Watch this blog. We will have more!!!